Tonight was family movie night. The kids picked one of my favorite holiday movies, "Home Alone". I've owned the movie, like, forever -- I have loved it since I first saw it when I like 15 years old. One of my favorite lines from the movie has now come back to bite me in the ....
"Kevin, I wouldn't let you sleep in my room if you were growing on my ass!"
I always loved the way the kid delivered the line and the look on his face. It cracked me up, until I had kids. I was setting up the kids table in front of the t.v. -- cause we do that on Friday nights -- and I heard the line. I let out a little giggle and that was all that was needed. My kids laughed and they didn't even know what they were laughing at. "Mom, what does growing on my ass mean?" Lucas asked. "It means that is something you aren't allowed to say," I said.
Great response, mom! They laughed even harder and said ass like 10 times. But as the movie progressed I didn't hear it again, so I hope I don't have to talk to Luc about the "a-word" before school on Monday.
Friday, November 21, 2008
Monday, November 17, 2008
Easiest dinner ever
My pantry was bare this morning as I contemplated what we'd have for dinner. I took a quick peek and decided to throw some things in the crockpot and see what happens.
I defrosted some chicken from the freezer, put that in the pot. Threw in some diced onions and some frozen corn. Then I topped it off with a container of Trader Joe's butternut squash soup. Put that on at about 10 a.m. (took all of about 10 minutes to do). At around 5ish, I heated some Trader Joe's frozen brown rice and threw that in the crockpot for about 30 minutes. We all sat down and everyone loved it -- even the kids! Awesome and easy and healthy!
The whole soup -- excluding the fruit we also had -- probably cost between $5.50 and $6.00 ($1.50 per person... awesome!)
I defrosted some chicken from the freezer, put that in the pot. Threw in some diced onions and some frozen corn. Then I topped it off with a container of Trader Joe's butternut squash soup. Put that on at about 10 a.m. (took all of about 10 minutes to do). At around 5ish, I heated some Trader Joe's frozen brown rice and threw that in the crockpot for about 30 minutes. We all sat down and everyone loved it -- even the kids! Awesome and easy and healthy!
The whole soup -- excluding the fruit we also had -- probably cost between $5.50 and $6.00 ($1.50 per person... awesome!)
Friday, November 14, 2008
washing dishes and why does the shit fall more heavily on some people than others
First I'll start with my dishes. I read that it is more environmentally friendly to wash your dishes with a machine rather than by hand. Fine by me. But it is better if you do not pre-rinse. Hmmm... I don't have that dishwasher where you can put a cake in it and the plate comes out clean, but I do have something that has been working. A dog. My dog has become the family pre-rinser. She is happy to oblige and she is a very hard worker. My only question is, do I have to pay her?
I have a woman who comes in to clean our house every two weeks. She has worked for my mom for years and is one of the nicest people I know. However, our finances have become tight lately and I've been meaning to tell her that I won't be able to have her come anymore but shit keeps happening to this poor woman. Today was the day I was going to do it, but she dropped a bomb and I couldn't. I can cut elsewhere. It's only $150/mo. Some women might get their hair and nails done, or buy gourmet coffee or shop at Whole Foods. Me, I only have to get down and dirty with my house myself twice a month instead of every week. The thing that gets me, though, is this woman has had a very difficult life since she was born. If it were me, I'd be headed for the looney bin, but not her... she picks herself up by her bootstraps and goes on with a smile. She is the oldest of 14 kids born to a poor family in Mexico. She basically had to raise her younger siblings from the time she was a small child. She didn't finish school. She was "taken" by an acquantaince of the family when she was 15 and held captive for 3 years. Her family didn't try to get her back because they were afraid. When she finally was returned at age 18, she was basically told to stuff her feelings. She came to the U.S. (she is legal) and helped her younger sisters. She's worked cleaning up after people since then. She has an alcoholic common-law husband, whom she has three children with. She finally got the nerve to kick him out only to have him back now, 5 years later, because he has heart failure and she is taking care of him while he dies. She doesn't love him, but as she tells me, "he is my children's father". Her beloved aunt died this year. One of her sons has had trouble with drugs and in school. The bomb today, her 18 year old daughter is pregnant. This young girl just started college. When she told me her daughter was starting college I was so happy. I was like, yes, you make her go to class and make sure she finishes. She's going to go on and do great things. Now the daughter is determined to keep the baby and finish college. I pray she does. Her mother has worked too fucking hard her entire life to have her child not do great things. Despite this, she owns her own home (in a scary neighborhood) and makes enough money to take care of herself and her kids. No handouts. She has medical insurance and car insurance.
The thing that absolutely kills me is that we had been talking lately about how she wanted to sell her home in January, when her daughter had been planning to move out, and she was going to get her own place. She was so excited that she would live by herself. Just take care of herself -- for the first time in her life. Now that dream is shattered because her daughter will most certainly need to live with her for some time. My heart aches, but still she has a smile and says a prayer and says that God will watch out for her. I wish I had a million dollars to give to her.
I have a woman who comes in to clean our house every two weeks. She has worked for my mom for years and is one of the nicest people I know. However, our finances have become tight lately and I've been meaning to tell her that I won't be able to have her come anymore but shit keeps happening to this poor woman. Today was the day I was going to do it, but she dropped a bomb and I couldn't. I can cut elsewhere. It's only $150/mo. Some women might get their hair and nails done, or buy gourmet coffee or shop at Whole Foods. Me, I only have to get down and dirty with my house myself twice a month instead of every week. The thing that gets me, though, is this woman has had a very difficult life since she was born. If it were me, I'd be headed for the looney bin, but not her... she picks herself up by her bootstraps and goes on with a smile. She is the oldest of 14 kids born to a poor family in Mexico. She basically had to raise her younger siblings from the time she was a small child. She didn't finish school. She was "taken" by an acquantaince of the family when she was 15 and held captive for 3 years. Her family didn't try to get her back because they were afraid. When she finally was returned at age 18, she was basically told to stuff her feelings. She came to the U.S. (she is legal) and helped her younger sisters. She's worked cleaning up after people since then. She has an alcoholic common-law husband, whom she has three children with. She finally got the nerve to kick him out only to have him back now, 5 years later, because he has heart failure and she is taking care of him while he dies. She doesn't love him, but as she tells me, "he is my children's father". Her beloved aunt died this year. One of her sons has had trouble with drugs and in school. The bomb today, her 18 year old daughter is pregnant. This young girl just started college. When she told me her daughter was starting college I was so happy. I was like, yes, you make her go to class and make sure she finishes. She's going to go on and do great things. Now the daughter is determined to keep the baby and finish college. I pray she does. Her mother has worked too fucking hard her entire life to have her child not do great things. Despite this, she owns her own home (in a scary neighborhood) and makes enough money to take care of herself and her kids. No handouts. She has medical insurance and car insurance.
The thing that absolutely kills me is that we had been talking lately about how she wanted to sell her home in January, when her daughter had been planning to move out, and she was going to get her own place. She was so excited that she would live by herself. Just take care of herself -- for the first time in her life. Now that dream is shattered because her daughter will most certainly need to live with her for some time. My heart aches, but still she has a smile and says a prayer and says that God will watch out for her. I wish I had a million dollars to give to her.
Thursday, November 13, 2008
I'm confused....
I am totally confused. That may not be news to some of you... but this particular confusion is regarding setting up a playdate for my daughter with her bff. It shouldn't be a big deal, right? In an earlier post, I noted how we had been canceled on for a playdate two times. I decided to give up. The mom had arranged play dates and then cancelled at the last minute each time. Sucks for the kids, because each time I drop my daughter off at school, her bff says, why can't I play at Amanda's house, or why can't Amanda play at my house? I don't know, go ask your mom!
Anyway, the mom had been working part time at the beginning of the year. Then, about two weeks ago I noticed her daughter had switched to 5 days a week at school, like my daughter. I figured the mom was working full time again. Cool.
But then last week, there was a cute card in Amanda's cubby. It was decorated by the bff and a note was written by an adult. "Hi Amanda, I want you to come play at my house soon. Love, bff."
Shit... I lost the mom's phone number because I didn't figure I would need it. But I did have her email address from when i was a room parent last year. I emailed her. The response I got was confusing.
Something like, "Oh, the problem is I'm working full-time now. But maybe we'll see you at the park for the preschool get-together." What? Why would you send a note basically inviting my daughter over if that wasn't what you intended? You work full-time. That's so cool. I work as well and understand that. But I wouldn't have my child invite another child over while knowing that it wasn't possible for them to come over. Make sense??
Anyway, the mom had been working part time at the beginning of the year. Then, about two weeks ago I noticed her daughter had switched to 5 days a week at school, like my daughter. I figured the mom was working full time again. Cool.
But then last week, there was a cute card in Amanda's cubby. It was decorated by the bff and a note was written by an adult. "Hi Amanda, I want you to come play at my house soon. Love, bff."
Shit... I lost the mom's phone number because I didn't figure I would need it. But I did have her email address from when i was a room parent last year. I emailed her. The response I got was confusing.
Something like, "Oh, the problem is I'm working full-time now. But maybe we'll see you at the park for the preschool get-together." What? Why would you send a note basically inviting my daughter over if that wasn't what you intended? You work full-time. That's so cool. I work as well and understand that. But I wouldn't have my child invite another child over while knowing that it wasn't possible for them to come over. Make sense??
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
I'm out, the "f" word and great depression
I'm officially counting myself out for nanowrimo this year. I missed the first day and then got into it for a few days, but I completely flaked this weekend. This week has been busy, so I haven't done any writing for nano since last Friday. It sucks, because I've been planning that this is the November I will reach the goal. But I tend to let life get in the way. My husband will offer to take over the kid duties in the evening for an hour or two, but when I go into the office and hear the little voices saying, "where's mommy... I want to go visit her in the office," I break down and read some books to my kids instead. The shitty thing is that I know it's a cop-out to say that I'm too busy. If I really wanted to finish this task, I would just do it. I would open up my laptop at 9 every night and work until I met that day's goal. But the truth is, my sofa and a good book just seem so much more appealing right now. I'm so stressed out about life in general that I would rather lose myself in a book someone else sweated over, than create something of my own. Maybe next year....
My son said the f word the other night. No, not the really bad one. It's the one that's not so bad, but you don't want to be the parent that lets your kid get away with saying it at inappropriate times. He was running down the hall after his bath and he turned to his sister and said, "Amanda, I just farted!" Then they both fell on the floor giggling uncontrollably. I swallowed my own laugh and asked him where he had heard that word. He said, "Mommy, it's no big deal. It just means burping from your butt!" Again with the laughter. Apparently he heard it from his pal at school. This is the same pal he picked up "Oh my God!" from. It's Oh My God this and Oh My God that all the time. We haven't every really used "fart" around here. I admit that I feel it's a more masculine term. I don't like saying it and I don't like hearing my 5 year old saying it. I've always used the lame term "gas". I guess it doesn't matter. There is absolutely no way to convince a young boy (or even a grown man, for that matter) that farting isn't funny.
This is all coming from a woman who curses worse than a sailor as soon as the kids are tucked in bed.
The news these days is all about recession, recession, recession. It's enough to stop a girl from going to get a large latte a few times a week. OK... I stopped my coffee splurges about 9 months ago, and I've cut back almost every where I can. There are still a few splurges that we haven't cut out yet -- eating one meal out on weekends and buying the kids new socks when their old ones are too small. I haven't had my hair cut since April and I've been coloring it at home -- the results aren't great, but they aren't terrible. We made a trip the the La Brea tarpits a couple of weekends ago -- kids had an excellent time -- and we dropped about $60, not including gas. We don't do that too often anymore. I haven't shopped for clothes in I don't know how long -- if you know me, you know I used to be a clothes whore. I love new clothes... they make me feel so good. But it's been about 6 months since I even bought myself a t-shirt. I did go to payless a couple of weeks ago and picked up a pair of brown flats because the pair I had -- from before Amanda was born -- had had it. As I visited Phil at work the other day, one of his receptionists said, "cute shoes, I have the same ones." I said, "yeah, payless is awesome!" She made an awful face and said, "uh... no, mine weren't from payless." Whatever! Anyway, all this is to say that I'm sure lots and lots of people are a bit stressed out these days. But I officially entered the great depression today. My neighbor -- two doors up -- just put his house on the market for $440,000! Shit. I could kill Fernando!!!! We purchased our house for more than $250K more than that two years ago. Fernando, dude, you are killing me.
My husband and I have been playing around with the idea of selling our place. Yes, we would lose the 20% we put down, but we wouldn't be up all night, every night, worrying about bills. Instead, we could be worrying about whether or not we were screwing up our kids. That is what parents are supposed to worry about, right? But, in light of Fernando's move, we now see that we can't sell our house for even what we owe. Thus, the great depression.
FERNANDO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
My son said the f word the other night. No, not the really bad one. It's the one that's not so bad, but you don't want to be the parent that lets your kid get away with saying it at inappropriate times. He was running down the hall after his bath and he turned to his sister and said, "Amanda, I just farted!" Then they both fell on the floor giggling uncontrollably. I swallowed my own laugh and asked him where he had heard that word. He said, "Mommy, it's no big deal. It just means burping from your butt!" Again with the laughter. Apparently he heard it from his pal at school. This is the same pal he picked up "Oh my God!" from. It's Oh My God this and Oh My God that all the time. We haven't every really used "fart" around here. I admit that I feel it's a more masculine term. I don't like saying it and I don't like hearing my 5 year old saying it. I've always used the lame term "gas". I guess it doesn't matter. There is absolutely no way to convince a young boy (or even a grown man, for that matter) that farting isn't funny.
This is all coming from a woman who curses worse than a sailor as soon as the kids are tucked in bed.
The news these days is all about recession, recession, recession. It's enough to stop a girl from going to get a large latte a few times a week. OK... I stopped my coffee splurges about 9 months ago, and I've cut back almost every where I can. There are still a few splurges that we haven't cut out yet -- eating one meal out on weekends and buying the kids new socks when their old ones are too small. I haven't had my hair cut since April and I've been coloring it at home -- the results aren't great, but they aren't terrible. We made a trip the the La Brea tarpits a couple of weekends ago -- kids had an excellent time -- and we dropped about $60, not including gas. We don't do that too often anymore. I haven't shopped for clothes in I don't know how long -- if you know me, you know I used to be a clothes whore. I love new clothes... they make me feel so good. But it's been about 6 months since I even bought myself a t-shirt. I did go to payless a couple of weeks ago and picked up a pair of brown flats because the pair I had -- from before Amanda was born -- had had it. As I visited Phil at work the other day, one of his receptionists said, "cute shoes, I have the same ones." I said, "yeah, payless is awesome!" She made an awful face and said, "uh... no, mine weren't from payless." Whatever! Anyway, all this is to say that I'm sure lots and lots of people are a bit stressed out these days. But I officially entered the great depression today. My neighbor -- two doors up -- just put his house on the market for $440,000! Shit. I could kill Fernando!!!! We purchased our house for more than $250K more than that two years ago. Fernando, dude, you are killing me.
My husband and I have been playing around with the idea of selling our place. Yes, we would lose the 20% we put down, but we wouldn't be up all night, every night, worrying about bills. Instead, we could be worrying about whether or not we were screwing up our kids. That is what parents are supposed to worry about, right? But, in light of Fernando's move, we now see that we can't sell our house for even what we owe. Thus, the great depression.
FERNANDO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Friday, November 07, 2008
Prop 8... prop 4
So, Prop 8 passed... I'm disgusted. Prop 4 was defeated... I'm equally disgusted. If these churches, which should be concerned with life, had put their money behind prop 4, instead of pumping millions of dollars into California to promote a bill that marginalizes a good percentage of our population, we'd maybe have some young girls protected.
Instead, I saw nothing regarding prop 4 from my church or any others in the area.
Whatever your stance on abortion, if you are a parent, don't you want to know if your 14 year old daughter is going make a life altering decision?
I thought Prop 8 would be defeated handily. Boy, was I wrong. There were rallies all around this town. The same folks voting for Obama, were trying to keep homosexuals from gaining the same rights as same sex couples.
I don't get it. I'm still stunned. Don't I live in California? Well, I thought California was a cut-above (yes, I'm a bit of a snob) but it turns out we're right inline with Arkansas. I know no-one from Arkansas reads this blog, so I can write that:) Really, I thought we were a progressive state. I guess not.
I knew prop 4 was a longshot... similar initiatives have been defeated in the past. But, perhaps if those church leaders had put their money where it really belonged, we'd be celebrating the fact that we can have the chance to talk with our daughters about important decisions. Instead, my neighbors are celebrating the fact that gays can't get married. Strange priorities these people have.
Instead, I saw nothing regarding prop 4 from my church or any others in the area.
Whatever your stance on abortion, if you are a parent, don't you want to know if your 14 year old daughter is going make a life altering decision?
I thought Prop 8 would be defeated handily. Boy, was I wrong. There were rallies all around this town. The same folks voting for Obama, were trying to keep homosexuals from gaining the same rights as same sex couples.
I don't get it. I'm still stunned. Don't I live in California? Well, I thought California was a cut-above (yes, I'm a bit of a snob) but it turns out we're right inline with Arkansas. I know no-one from Arkansas reads this blog, so I can write that:) Really, I thought we were a progressive state. I guess not.
I knew prop 4 was a longshot... similar initiatives have been defeated in the past. But, perhaps if those church leaders had put their money where it really belonged, we'd be celebrating the fact that we can have the chance to talk with our daughters about important decisions. Instead, my neighbors are celebrating the fact that gays can't get married. Strange priorities these people have.
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
We're doing something right
We were sitting at dinner last night and the kids were talking about what they want to be when they grow up. Lucas said he wanted to build rocket-ships and be a scientist. We said, great, you should be a scientist if you are going to design rockets. The he said, "I'm also going to invent medicines to help people get better. And if some people don't have enough money to pay for the medicine, I'll give it to them for free."
The lump in my throat was as big as an apple.
Then Amanda chimed in... "I'm going to be a mad scientist and I'm going to make lots of toys and give them to all the kids for free!"
That will make you Santa Claus, I said:)
We talk a lot around here lately about sharing with those who have less than us. We talk a lot about not buying every toy we see -- we need to appreciate what we have because there are others out there who have much less than we do and we can be happy just being together.
But how that translated into providing free medicine to poor people, I don't know. Maybe that NPR that I play in the kids room while they sleep is doing the trick:)
The lump in my throat was as big as an apple.
Then Amanda chimed in... "I'm going to be a mad scientist and I'm going to make lots of toys and give them to all the kids for free!"
That will make you Santa Claus, I said:)
We talk a lot around here lately about sharing with those who have less than us. We talk a lot about not buying every toy we see -- we need to appreciate what we have because there are others out there who have much less than we do and we can be happy just being together.
But how that translated into providing free medicine to poor people, I don't know. Maybe that NPR that I play in the kids room while they sleep is doing the trick:)
Friday, October 24, 2008
I'm being bombarded, and I'm a chicken
It's all around me... Yes on 8.
Help!
A neighbor from down the street just knocked on my door to give me some literature to vote yes on prop 8. Did I challenge her? No. I'm a chicken. I opened my mouth to say something, but she smiled and said she lived down the road and I held my tongue. I knew if I said something, it wouldn't change her mind. I just thanked her and took the papers, which will now go into the recycle bin.
Another run in with Yes on prop 8 happened the other night. Lucas has recently befriended a boy in another kindergarten class. I've met his mom at the park a few times and she seems nice. She is the children's librarian at our local library and is about my age. We went to a fundraiser for school at the local pizza place the other night and she was there with her son. We started talking and then I saw it... a huge pin with the "Yes on 8" logo. I glared at it for a second, but didn't say anything. What is wrong with people?!
Last weekend was the festival at the Catholic church up the road. The church stands on the corner of a main intersection in our city. One one side, there were about 20 or so young people with homemade signs saying No on 8. They were a colorful group. They had a horn and some weren't wearing shirts. On the opposite corner were about 30 or so people of all ages (young kids and old people) all wearing Yes on 8 shirts with signs that were professionally made. It was a Prop 8 duel. I honked to the No folks and gave a thumbs down to the Yes folks. It seems like the Yes people have a lot more money behind them... just by looking at the different signs and the people in the crowd.
Anyway, I'm not looking for comments, just venting that it feels crappy to be in the minority in my fair city.
Help!
A neighbor from down the street just knocked on my door to give me some literature to vote yes on prop 8. Did I challenge her? No. I'm a chicken. I opened my mouth to say something, but she smiled and said she lived down the road and I held my tongue. I knew if I said something, it wouldn't change her mind. I just thanked her and took the papers, which will now go into the recycle bin.
Another run in with Yes on prop 8 happened the other night. Lucas has recently befriended a boy in another kindergarten class. I've met his mom at the park a few times and she seems nice. She is the children's librarian at our local library and is about my age. We went to a fundraiser for school at the local pizza place the other night and she was there with her son. We started talking and then I saw it... a huge pin with the "Yes on 8" logo. I glared at it for a second, but didn't say anything. What is wrong with people?!
Last weekend was the festival at the Catholic church up the road. The church stands on the corner of a main intersection in our city. One one side, there were about 20 or so young people with homemade signs saying No on 8. They were a colorful group. They had a horn and some weren't wearing shirts. On the opposite corner were about 30 or so people of all ages (young kids and old people) all wearing Yes on 8 shirts with signs that were professionally made. It was a Prop 8 duel. I honked to the No folks and gave a thumbs down to the Yes folks. It seems like the Yes people have a lot more money behind them... just by looking at the different signs and the people in the crowd.
Anyway, I'm not looking for comments, just venting that it feels crappy to be in the minority in my fair city.
Thursday, October 23, 2008
Scenario
There is a small tribe of people. More than half of the farmers lost their years crop to disease but a few farmer's crops seemed to survive. Those farmers do not want to share their crop with the other members of the tribe. Many families will starve in the winter if the farmer's do not share their bounty with the other members of the tribe.
Both sets of farmers worked hard all year long on their crop, but one set just had bad luck.
Should the tribe council force the lucky farmers to share their crop with the rest of the tribe?
Both sets of farmers worked hard all year long on their crop, but one set just had bad luck.
Should the tribe council force the lucky farmers to share their crop with the rest of the tribe?
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
birth control and business owners
I saw a story today about a new pharmacy in Virginia that has opened and will not fill prescriptions for birth control pills
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20081022/ap_on_re_us/no_contraceptives_pharmacy
My first reaction was, "whatever, I just wouldn't shop at that pharmacy. They are business owners and I guess that if they feel birth control is immoral, then I'll just quietly take my business elsewhere." I'm a practicing Catholic who wholeheartedly believes that the church has made a mistake in its stance on birth control and I'm not alone. I think that the reasons are probably pretty shady, just as their reasons for not allowing priests to marry or women to be ordained are based on things other than Jesus' teachings.
I have a very strong reaction when someone tries to tell me how I can control my reproductive system. I'm not talking abortion here -- I am opposed to abortion -- but I'm talking about my right to choose when I want to get pregnant or if I want to get a disease. I'm a fairly intelligent being and if I do a bit of research and take proper precautions, then chances are very good that I won't end up with a baby I didn't plan on. I think birth control should be easier to get, not harder. A young girl and go and get an abortion with no notice to her parents, but she needs a prescription to get the pill.
Get this, the pharmacy won't even sell condoms. Not that they have to -- I'm not trying to take that right away from them -- but that is just fucking stupid. Women need to protect themselves from pregnancy with the pill, but they also need condoms to protect themselves from potential diseases. The bad part of me -- we all have a bit of that -- has a split second where I wonder how this pharmacist would feel if his daughter ended up with herpes or something worse.
Anyway, I'm ranting because I just hate it when men try to keep women in their place, as has been happening since the dawn of time. Why am I so upset when I've just said that he is free to run his business as he chooses? Well, someone on another Web site brought up the point that in rural areas, if the local pharmacy decides not to sell contraceptives, there may not be another pharmacy for 25 or 30 miles. What's a young girl to do? What is a cash-strapped mom to do? It irks me, yet still, I have to concede that the pharmacist shouldn't be forced to sell contraception. I do think that the government should then make sure they provide some sort of service to make it available to women even in the most remote parts of the country. I know, one of you is cringing because I said "the government should provide...." But damnit, if you want to reduce abortions, you better make damn sure that women have easy access to contraception. If they can bail out unethical bankers to the tune of $700 billion, they can kick down some cabbage to make sure our women's reproductive rights are protected.
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20081022/ap_on_re_us/no_contraceptives_pharmacy
My first reaction was, "whatever, I just wouldn't shop at that pharmacy. They are business owners and I guess that if they feel birth control is immoral, then I'll just quietly take my business elsewhere." I'm a practicing Catholic who wholeheartedly believes that the church has made a mistake in its stance on birth control and I'm not alone. I think that the reasons are probably pretty shady, just as their reasons for not allowing priests to marry or women to be ordained are based on things other than Jesus' teachings.
I have a very strong reaction when someone tries to tell me how I can control my reproductive system. I'm not talking abortion here -- I am opposed to abortion -- but I'm talking about my right to choose when I want to get pregnant or if I want to get a disease. I'm a fairly intelligent being and if I do a bit of research and take proper precautions, then chances are very good that I won't end up with a baby I didn't plan on. I think birth control should be easier to get, not harder. A young girl and go and get an abortion with no notice to her parents, but she needs a prescription to get the pill.
Get this, the pharmacy won't even sell condoms. Not that they have to -- I'm not trying to take that right away from them -- but that is just fucking stupid. Women need to protect themselves from pregnancy with the pill, but they also need condoms to protect themselves from potential diseases. The bad part of me -- we all have a bit of that -- has a split second where I wonder how this pharmacist would feel if his daughter ended up with herpes or something worse.
Anyway, I'm ranting because I just hate it when men try to keep women in their place, as has been happening since the dawn of time. Why am I so upset when I've just said that he is free to run his business as he chooses? Well, someone on another Web site brought up the point that in rural areas, if the local pharmacy decides not to sell contraceptives, there may not be another pharmacy for 25 or 30 miles. What's a young girl to do? What is a cash-strapped mom to do? It irks me, yet still, I have to concede that the pharmacist shouldn't be forced to sell contraception. I do think that the government should then make sure they provide some sort of service to make it available to women even in the most remote parts of the country. I know, one of you is cringing because I said "the government should provide...." But damnit, if you want to reduce abortions, you better make damn sure that women have easy access to contraception. If they can bail out unethical bankers to the tune of $700 billion, they can kick down some cabbage to make sure our women's reproductive rights are protected.
Thursday, October 09, 2008
Broken playdates, broken hearts
There is one mom at my daughter's preschool who is, in my mind a 9.5. Even my husband concurs that she is extremely attractive. Of course, her daughter happens to be the flavor of the month for my daughter. They are buds and play at school. They ask me when they can have a playdate every time I pick my daughter up from school. I finally had Amanda make a card for her friend and we invited her for a playdate. The mom called and it was arranged for last Friday afternoon. My daughter was very excited as she headed off for school that day -- after she got home, her friend would come over to play. What fun! Except.... the mom called me early in the afternoon to cancel. Her son was sick. Totally understandable, but I still had to deal with a devastated 3 year old.
Last night we had a fundraiser at a local eatery. We met up with mom of daughter's new bff and we talked for quite a while. This woman is definitely out of my league:) Anyway, we rescheduled the playdate for this Friday. Kids were very excited. The mom called me this afternoon to cancel. Apparently she forgot about a previous engagement she had. She said something about next week, but nothing firm. O.K., now I'm feeling a little paranoid and self-conscious. My daughter doesn't know yet that her bff won't be coming over tomorrow. I'm hoping she'll forget, but I know she won't.
I feel like I'm in high school again and trying to get with the "in crowd" but I can't find my way in. Except, I don't care about being friends with this woman (remember, she's out of my league) but my daughter does want to hang with her kid. What's the deal?
Last night we had a fundraiser at a local eatery. We met up with mom of daughter's new bff and we talked for quite a while. This woman is definitely out of my league:) Anyway, we rescheduled the playdate for this Friday. Kids were very excited. The mom called me this afternoon to cancel. Apparently she forgot about a previous engagement she had. She said something about next week, but nothing firm. O.K., now I'm feeling a little paranoid and self-conscious. My daughter doesn't know yet that her bff won't be coming over tomorrow. I'm hoping she'll forget, but I know she won't.
I feel like I'm in high school again and trying to get with the "in crowd" but I can't find my way in. Except, I don't care about being friends with this woman (remember, she's out of my league) but my daughter does want to hang with her kid. What's the deal?
More on prop 8
So, I was outside this afternoon and I ran into my neighbor. She asked me a strange question... would I like a Yes on Prop 8 sign for my yard? She had an extra one. Isn't that a strange way of trying to find out how I'm going to vote. I wouldn't dream of asking someone (besides joking with a family member) if they would like an Obama sticker for their car.
Anyway, we were talking and just didn't really agree. I'm glad that she seems to be like me, in that she won't stop being friendly because I don't agree with her views. I feel the same way and hope that we continue to know each other better.
One thing she said was that if Prop 8 passes, our children will be forced to learn that marriage between a couple of the same sex is the same as marriage between heterosexuals. But I don't really understand... don't they already teach tolerance in schools, and since when is learning about marriage something you learn in school?
Again, I don't see how gay marriage undermines religion. People can get married by non-religious organizations. So, if we are truly a country that separates God from the state, then I don't see the problem. There are plenty of atheists who get married. There are people who are infertile or don't desire to have children, there are older couples who will never have children together and they all get married. So the idea that marriage is only for procreation is not true.
Throughout the history of man, there have been many different kinds of marriages... We evolve.
As a married Catholic, with two children, I do not feel that my marriage is any less valid if same sex people can marry. I once thought that prop 8 was a longshot to pass, but the more I drive around my neighborhood, the more nervous I get. I'm going to have to get involved.
Look... I don't have any gay people in my life that I count as close friends. I have known gay people, but I'm not coming down on the side of gay marriage because my brother or cousin or best friend is gay. I'm coming down on the side of gay marriage because I think it is right and fair.
Anyway, we were talking and just didn't really agree. I'm glad that she seems to be like me, in that she won't stop being friendly because I don't agree with her views. I feel the same way and hope that we continue to know each other better.
One thing she said was that if Prop 8 passes, our children will be forced to learn that marriage between a couple of the same sex is the same as marriage between heterosexuals. But I don't really understand... don't they already teach tolerance in schools, and since when is learning about marriage something you learn in school?
Again, I don't see how gay marriage undermines religion. People can get married by non-religious organizations. So, if we are truly a country that separates God from the state, then I don't see the problem. There are plenty of atheists who get married. There are people who are infertile or don't desire to have children, there are older couples who will never have children together and they all get married. So the idea that marriage is only for procreation is not true.
Throughout the history of man, there have been many different kinds of marriages... We evolve.
As a married Catholic, with two children, I do not feel that my marriage is any less valid if same sex people can marry. I once thought that prop 8 was a longshot to pass, but the more I drive around my neighborhood, the more nervous I get. I'm going to have to get involved.
Look... I don't have any gay people in my life that I count as close friends. I have known gay people, but I'm not coming down on the side of gay marriage because my brother or cousin or best friend is gay. I'm coming down on the side of gay marriage because I think it is right and fair.
creepy
Driving home from errands today I passed by a house that, of course, has the yes on 8 sign. That wasn't the creepy part. What was creepy was that hanging in front of one of the windows was a handmade No on 8 sign that was obviously made by children. It was very colorful and full of glitter and stickers -- I would have thought it quite beautiful, if not for the message. Now we're enlisting our little ones to help us spread the message that we aren't all equal.
I guess I shouldn't talk, though, I was tempted to get an Obama shirt for my kids. But I didn't -- I didn't want to make them the sandwich boards for my beliefs. We do talk about politics around them, but I try to be a bit generic. They both know I'm most likely going to vote for Obama, only because they asked me and I wasn't going to lie. Of course, now they both want to vote for Obama. It just shows you that your very little kids will often want to do whatever you do. I try not to say anything negative about McCain/Palin -- just that I like Obama better. I don't know if this is the right thing to do or not.
I guess I shouldn't talk, though, I was tempted to get an Obama shirt for my kids. But I didn't -- I didn't want to make them the sandwich boards for my beliefs. We do talk about politics around them, but I try to be a bit generic. They both know I'm most likely going to vote for Obama, only because they asked me and I wasn't going to lie. Of course, now they both want to vote for Obama. It just shows you that your very little kids will often want to do whatever you do. I try not to say anything negative about McCain/Palin -- just that I like Obama better. I don't know if this is the right thing to do or not.
Wednesday, October 08, 2008
Why all the hate?
I've come to accept the fact that I live in McCain land. There are yard signs up all over my neighborhood and they mostly consist of McCain/Palin signs. First of all, come on guys... you live in California and Obama is going to win here. I have seen one Obama sticker when I take Luc to school and in another neighborhood I saw, gasp, two Obama yard signs. I'm thinkin', maybe the Obama folks just don't want to flaunt it, or waste their money because they know he'll win in CA.
Anywho.... my neighbors just popped up a "Yes on 8" sign. For those of you not living in California, that eliminates the right to same sex marriage in our Golden State.
I just want to know, why the hate?
There are tons of "yes on 8" signs in my neighborhood and this disturbs me. What reason, beyond religion, is there to make a constitutional amendment banning same sex marraige? I want to know. We are supposed to have a separation of church and state here, so what other reason can you give me for banning it? Churches don't have to marry people of the same sex -- they can walk down to the city hall and take care of it. What's the deal?
I wholeheartedly oppose prop 8 and it saddens me to know that people I know and like support it.
Anywho.... my neighbors just popped up a "Yes on 8" sign. For those of you not living in California, that eliminates the right to same sex marriage in our Golden State.
I just want to know, why the hate?
There are tons of "yes on 8" signs in my neighborhood and this disturbs me. What reason, beyond religion, is there to make a constitutional amendment banning same sex marraige? I want to know. We are supposed to have a separation of church and state here, so what other reason can you give me for banning it? Churches don't have to marry people of the same sex -- they can walk down to the city hall and take care of it. What's the deal?
I wholeheartedly oppose prop 8 and it saddens me to know that people I know and like support it.
Tuesday, October 07, 2008
I'm not John McCain's Friend
I'm not John McCain's friend and I don't like it when he says "goodies".
Sunday, September 28, 2008
Church, my yard and other people's trees
We made it to church early this morning and we still didn't get a good seat! I live about 3 blocks from my church, but I still usually get there right as the priest is about to get started. I wish the "children's mass" wasn't at 9 a.m.! Anyway, this morning I had my shit together and we left the house at 9:45 and got to church at about 9:50. 10 minutes... 10 minutes early and still I had to sit in the back where the kids can't see what is going on. I think the church needs to invest in stadium seating. The kids were good and were able to enjoy a doughnut after mass. I've only been taking them to church with me for about 6 months and I still can't imagine how my mom handled 7 during the weekly service. I only have two (but I am flying solo) and they drive me bonkers. They don't want to go to Sunday school, so they usually stay with me and ask me how much longer, every 2 minutes. I tell them they should be grateful they are Catholic and only have to sacrifice 1 hour each week:)
After we had lunch I dug into some yardwork. After 5 hours in the yard -- well, on and off in the yard, playing with the kids, cleaning up mud they and the dogs tracked in and vaccuming up some spills throughout the day -- I am extremely depressed. I got to about 1/4 of my yardwork for the fall. I still have so much more and I don't know where I'm going to find another 15 hours to finish the rest. My lot isn't huge -- about 11k sq. ft. -- but it might as well be 10 acres. there is so much pruning, weeding, lawn to be cut, fountains to be cleaned out, and there is still the dead zone (about 200 sq. ft. of dirt) that I am constantly tinkering with. I have a list of projects that need to be done inside the house and garage and I think by the time I get to those it will be spring cleaning time. I spend an hour or two each week on regular maintenance, but that doesn't cut it. I still have to do major work each of the four seasons. The thing that kills me is that my yard doesn't look glorious for all of my hard work. I have a notorious black thumb and no creative mind for budget landscaping. I see lots of people in my middle-class neighborhood with really pretty yards and I just don't know how they do it. They haven't had to spend tons of money, but they just know what works and what doesn't. Oh well, I'll just keep pulling up weeds and sweeping up my mess.
You know the only thing worse than having a tree on your property that is messy? Having a neigbhor with about 5 olive trees that hang over your back wall and spit their messy fruit all summer and fall. It's all over my yard and has to be raked up before mowing. It sucks. Why don't people invest in non-fruiting olive trees for landscaping?
After we had lunch I dug into some yardwork. After 5 hours in the yard -- well, on and off in the yard, playing with the kids, cleaning up mud they and the dogs tracked in and vaccuming up some spills throughout the day -- I am extremely depressed. I got to about 1/4 of my yardwork for the fall. I still have so much more and I don't know where I'm going to find another 15 hours to finish the rest. My lot isn't huge -- about 11k sq. ft. -- but it might as well be 10 acres. there is so much pruning, weeding, lawn to be cut, fountains to be cleaned out, and there is still the dead zone (about 200 sq. ft. of dirt) that I am constantly tinkering with. I have a list of projects that need to be done inside the house and garage and I think by the time I get to those it will be spring cleaning time. I spend an hour or two each week on regular maintenance, but that doesn't cut it. I still have to do major work each of the four seasons. The thing that kills me is that my yard doesn't look glorious for all of my hard work. I have a notorious black thumb and no creative mind for budget landscaping. I see lots of people in my middle-class neighborhood with really pretty yards and I just don't know how they do it. They haven't had to spend tons of money, but they just know what works and what doesn't. Oh well, I'll just keep pulling up weeds and sweeping up my mess.
You know the only thing worse than having a tree on your property that is messy? Having a neigbhor with about 5 olive trees that hang over your back wall and spit their messy fruit all summer and fall. It's all over my yard and has to be raked up before mowing. It sucks. Why don't people invest in non-fruiting olive trees for landscaping?
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
Three dogs
Help! I'm in a zoo!
My mom recently lent me the book "Three Dog Life" -- a memoir. It was OK, but I had to lie a bit because my mom freakin loved the book and I was really ho-hum about it.
Anyway, tonight she dropped off her two dogs at my place. She's going to be parading around Ireland while I have to pick up extra poop.
Craziness is all around me. My mom's dogs are a 40 pound mutt and a 4 pound chihuahua. I have a 14 pound mutt. They are currently brawling at my feet. It is total chaos. There is going to be dog hair everywhere -- my dog just jumpd on my laptop and the 40 pounder just dropped a nasty chew toy on my leg. Tiki, the 4 pounder -- is currently shaking up on top of the couch, right above my shoulder.
It will be an interesting night. We drop the 40 pounder at my brother's house tomorrow and we'll get her back on Saturday. Then we give the 4 pounder to another person to watch and we get the 40 pounder back until early October. Musical dogs... fun!
My mom recently lent me the book "Three Dog Life" -- a memoir. It was OK, but I had to lie a bit because my mom freakin loved the book and I was really ho-hum about it.
Anyway, tonight she dropped off her two dogs at my place. She's going to be parading around Ireland while I have to pick up extra poop.
Craziness is all around me. My mom's dogs are a 40 pound mutt and a 4 pound chihuahua. I have a 14 pound mutt. They are currently brawling at my feet. It is total chaos. There is going to be dog hair everywhere -- my dog just jumpd on my laptop and the 40 pounder just dropped a nasty chew toy on my leg. Tiki, the 4 pounder -- is currently shaking up on top of the couch, right above my shoulder.
It will be an interesting night. We drop the 40 pounder at my brother's house tomorrow and we'll get her back on Saturday. Then we give the 4 pounder to another person to watch and we get the 40 pounder back until early October. Musical dogs... fun!
I think my neighbor is trying to convert me
Let me preface this by saying that I really like my neighbors. I feel so lucky to live next door to them and that they are so friendly. They have 4 children, the youngest of whom is 4.5 -- right in between Lucas and Amanda. The kids are forever playing together and run between our two houses all the time. I love that... that's the kind of neighbor I've always wanted.
A couple of months ago, my neighbor asked if Amanda would be in a little talent show with her daughter at her church -- she is Mormon. She said her daughter was a bit nervous and would like it if Amanda could do the show with her. We agreed and it was very cute. There was no sales pitch, or anything like that. Then, last Saturday, she stopped by to say that her daughter was going to have a small part in something for her Sunday school and she would like us to be there. I thought, what the heck. My husband warned me that it would be a real service, but I said, no, she just said it was a little show or something. Well, Phil was right. It was a full service with communion and everything. Then the preaching about making sure Prop 8 passes here in California started and I clenched my fists. They were starting to preach about the wrongness of being gay. Anyway, our neighbor's child was very cute and everyone was friendly. I thought that was that.
Today the daughter was playing at our house and when my neighbor came to pick her up, she mentioned that she'd like to have us back at church with her and have the kids go to Sunday school with her daughter. She wants to take me to a few classes. I am Catholic and she knows this. I attend mass probably every other Sunday -- I skipped last Sunday to go to the Mormon service. I thought God would think this is OK -- I personally think if I'm hookin' up with other Christians and thanking God for all I have, he'll give me props.
Now the dilemma. I wouldn't mind going with her to her Church occasionally, I really would not, but I don't want to mislead her. I'm not going to ever convert -- and I'm especially not going to become a Mormon.
I'm a Catholic. I've tried other churches, but they aren't my peeps. It's too ingrained. I don't always agree with some of the teachings of the Pope -- eg. birth control and homosexuality -- but I believe in Christ and I want to live more like him.
What do I do? I don't want to dis my neighbor, but I don't want to lead her on, thinking I might someday convert.
The think about Mormonism -- and I don't intend to offend anyone out there -- is that, as I've read, they believe that you aren't truly baptized in Christ's church unless you are baptized by a Mormon priest. That doesn't make any sense to me. Joseph Smith came along, what in the 1800's. What happened to all those folks baptized for 1800+ years? They say Peter came to Joseph Smith, but Peter was the founder of the Catholic Church, so why would he defect like that?
I don't know.... I like the oldness of my religion. It is comfortable to me, like my favorite pair of jeans. It fits. I like that, at least in my local church, they don't tell me how to vote. I like my politics with my politics and my religion with my religion. I don't believe that Jesus is going to condemn anyone who has tried to lead a good life just because they weren't fortunate to have been baptized by a certain kind of priest. I don't believe you can be Christ-like when you are busy condemning other people. You need to first make sure you are living your own life in a good way and then try to lead people to that way. But don't throw stones at them or condemn them. Only God can do that.
That's all I have to say.
Do you have any advice on how to gingerly let my neighbor know that I won't be converting anytime soon?
A couple of months ago, my neighbor asked if Amanda would be in a little talent show with her daughter at her church -- she is Mormon. She said her daughter was a bit nervous and would like it if Amanda could do the show with her. We agreed and it was very cute. There was no sales pitch, or anything like that. Then, last Saturday, she stopped by to say that her daughter was going to have a small part in something for her Sunday school and she would like us to be there. I thought, what the heck. My husband warned me that it would be a real service, but I said, no, she just said it was a little show or something. Well, Phil was right. It was a full service with communion and everything. Then the preaching about making sure Prop 8 passes here in California started and I clenched my fists. They were starting to preach about the wrongness of being gay. Anyway, our neighbor's child was very cute and everyone was friendly. I thought that was that.
Today the daughter was playing at our house and when my neighbor came to pick her up, she mentioned that she'd like to have us back at church with her and have the kids go to Sunday school with her daughter. She wants to take me to a few classes. I am Catholic and she knows this. I attend mass probably every other Sunday -- I skipped last Sunday to go to the Mormon service. I thought God would think this is OK -- I personally think if I'm hookin' up with other Christians and thanking God for all I have, he'll give me props.
Now the dilemma. I wouldn't mind going with her to her Church occasionally, I really would not, but I don't want to mislead her. I'm not going to ever convert -- and I'm especially not going to become a Mormon.
I'm a Catholic. I've tried other churches, but they aren't my peeps. It's too ingrained. I don't always agree with some of the teachings of the Pope -- eg. birth control and homosexuality -- but I believe in Christ and I want to live more like him.
What do I do? I don't want to dis my neighbor, but I don't want to lead her on, thinking I might someday convert.
The think about Mormonism -- and I don't intend to offend anyone out there -- is that, as I've read, they believe that you aren't truly baptized in Christ's church unless you are baptized by a Mormon priest. That doesn't make any sense to me. Joseph Smith came along, what in the 1800's. What happened to all those folks baptized for 1800+ years? They say Peter came to Joseph Smith, but Peter was the founder of the Catholic Church, so why would he defect like that?
I don't know.... I like the oldness of my religion. It is comfortable to me, like my favorite pair of jeans. It fits. I like that, at least in my local church, they don't tell me how to vote. I like my politics with my politics and my religion with my religion. I don't believe that Jesus is going to condemn anyone who has tried to lead a good life just because they weren't fortunate to have been baptized by a certain kind of priest. I don't believe you can be Christ-like when you are busy condemning other people. You need to first make sure you are living your own life in a good way and then try to lead people to that way. But don't throw stones at them or condemn them. Only God can do that.
That's all I have to say.
Do you have any advice on how to gingerly let my neighbor know that I won't be converting anytime soon?
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
New neighbors and fallout from political choices
New neighbors are moving into Mr. Frank's house. They have two kids -- and their youngest goes to Kindergarten with Luc. We are so happy that the cul-de-sac is filling up with some children for our kids to play with.
Speaking of the neighbors, the new neighbor mom works for a really good orthopedic surgeon in the area. My husband (a PT) speaks highly of him and is hoping that our close proximity will help some referrals come his way. But here is the thing... he said that he'd rather not claim his political leanings to the neighbors. Some of the people he treats have a real hatred for people who are on the other side of the political aisle from themselves. He's afraid that if someone spots my Obama08 car magnet, it might hurt him professionally. I disagree, but then I'm more of a "happy go lucky" type and I would not hold someone's politics against them.
I told him I would remove the magnet if he really wants me to, but he said it is my decision. He's my husband, so my initial reaction is to respect his feelings, but part of me cringes a bit because I don't want to be afraid to publicize my views.
What do you think?
Speaking of the neighbors, the new neighbor mom works for a really good orthopedic surgeon in the area. My husband (a PT) speaks highly of him and is hoping that our close proximity will help some referrals come his way. But here is the thing... he said that he'd rather not claim his political leanings to the neighbors. Some of the people he treats have a real hatred for people who are on the other side of the political aisle from themselves. He's afraid that if someone spots my Obama08 car magnet, it might hurt him professionally. I disagree, but then I'm more of a "happy go lucky" type and I would not hold someone's politics against them.
I told him I would remove the magnet if he really wants me to, but he said it is my decision. He's my husband, so my initial reaction is to respect his feelings, but part of me cringes a bit because I don't want to be afraid to publicize my views.
What do you think?
Thursday, September 04, 2008
Red meat
Dude, if I hear another journalist say "red meat" I'm going to freak out! Can't they come up with original ideas. If one journalist uses the term, does every single freakin' other journalist have to start with the same line?
Hate it... 2 more months... blah!!!
Hate it... 2 more months... blah!!!
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