Gas

My kids are at an age where passing gas in front of others is funny. My daughter is very quick to say, "excuse me" before she falls over laughing. My son just thinks it is the funniest thing ever if he has gas while showing me his latest ninja moves.
I don't know at what age this changes, but apparently by the age of 9 or 10, it isn't cool to do this in front of the opposite sex.
We were at my son's karate class today and an older boy, waiting in the wings for the next class, was messing around with some karate moves. He was apparently trying to impress his classmate, a girl, who was standing next to him. Amanda and I were sitting next to them when we heard it... the unmistakable fart. The boy quickly moved to the opposite wall. The girl then went to stand next to him and said, "you stink." He was quick to reply that someone had farted, but it wasn't him. He went on and on about this for about 2 minutes... "someone farted, but it wasn't me."
I was very tempted to help him out and say, "Oh, sorry, I had Taco Bell for lunch," but I didn't. Instead I watched as the red-faced boy went outside to wait for his class to begin.

Day two done

Day two without a car went off without a hitch. We walked down to the market to pick up a few things since my mother and aunt were coming for a visit.
In the afternoon we walked down to the park for Luc's karate class.
So far, living without a car has made me slow down. Even though you might think I would have to speed up because getting places takes longer, the past two days have just forced me to use my time more wisely.
When the kids were all in their class at the park yesterday, I sat outside the room and read -- normally I would drive home and get some work done for about 30 minutes before racing back to the park. It was really nice. I feel like the kids and I don't have to rush places and they stop and pick dandelions and blow the seeds, or they try to avoid walking on the cracks in the sidewalk. I haven't been heard to say, "Hurry up!" quite as much.

Even if we do end up with a car this weekend, I hope I can keep up the slower pace.

1st morning

Got the kids out the door at 8:15 a.m. Walked the .86 miles to their school. Dropped them off, chatted with teacher for a moment and then headed the .86 miles back home. I got back at 9 a.m. and now it's time for work. Not too bad.

+++++++ Continued
First full day is done.
Got a bunch of work done and then walked down to pick up 3 kids. We made it about halfway to the park and my nephew's mom pulled up -- she got off work a bit early. She took the boys and headed to the park. Amanda and I tried to beat her, but my jogging stroller was no match for her German wagon. The kids had a great time at their class and chatted about it as we strolled home from the park. Overall the day was very good. The kids don't miss the car, yet....

To be quite honest, I think I could do this for a while, but the outside pressure is great. It isn't in the nature of a Californian to be without a car. I'm getting grief from all sides, and add to that the pressure from my husband who feels that not owning a car says something about his manhood -- not something good.
Today my mom seemed quite dismayed when I told her I had no car. Others have also looked at me like I have 3 eyes.
Whatever, I may give into the pressure, as I usually do.

Car free day 1 and kindergarten worries

Well, I've been car-free for about 6 hours now... so far it's alright:)
We rented a car over the weekend so that we could drive around town to check out some used cars. Nothing was knocking our socks off. In fact, everything was scaring us away. We have decided to just take things one day at a time. I dropped the car off at the rental place (at a local mall) and then walked the 1.5 miles to pick my kids up from school. Then we all walked the .8 miles home. The fresh air seemed to do them good.
I've mapped out some routes to places we normally go and things should be ok, until I want to see my mom, and then I'm going to have to find a bus route or cab it. Tomorrow we'll walk to school, I'll come home and dig into work. I'll bus it out to the mail place where I pick up my work mail and then I'll pick the kids up (plus cousin) and head down to the park, .5 miles from school, for a class they are all taking. We'll then walk home from the park (.75 miles).
On Wednesday I'll do some work in the morning, then I'll pack the kids into the double stroller and walk the 1.75 miles to the library, spend some time there, hit the park next door for some fun and lunch and then walk 1.75 miles home, stopping to pick up a few things at the market.
That's the plan, anyway... for any of you who know me, that could change at the drop of a hat.

As I said, we'll take it slow and if I go too crazy we'll just have to figure something out. Ideally, though, we'll stick with this plan for about 3 months and then lease a new car. By then all debts (except for the house) will be paid, kids will be in school full time and we'll be in a much better place.

Now on to kindergarten news....
My son will be starting the big K in the fall. I've been looking at a couple of local private schools -- we might win the lottery this summer -- and one of them is just wonderful. It actually costs less than I'm paying for his preschool, but my husband has been waiting for the day that freeschool starts. So, while I know he'll most likely have to attend our neighborhood school (a mere .25 mile walk), I wish he didn't have to. I never went to public elementary school, so I don't know much about it, but my mother has planted the seed that public education stinks.

On the way home from preschool today we stopped by our neighborhood K-5 school to pick up the kindergarten registration packet. The woman in the office was nice enough and I know that many parents like the school, but still, I'm nervous. After reading through some of the paperwork, I think I have a right to be.
The school gives you this list of things to work on with your child over the summer. Things like counting, identifying colors, learning the alphabet (these kids are 5, haven't they known these things for a while?) and reading. The reading bit was what got me. The flier says, "Familiarity with books -- read a lot of book to you child!"
No, I don't have a typo in there, I'm quoting the flier!
Now I'm freaking out. I may not always use the proper grammar and my spelling is atrocious, but I'm not teaching a whole classroom of 5-6 year olds.
I'm really worried -- I'm really, really worried.

Vanagon out... what else?

OK, so the Vanagon is out. Last night I had bad dreams of an oil-burning VW. I completely forgot that my parents owned two vw buses in the mid '80s. These things weren't exactly safe. If I were single, perhaps I might go this route, but looking at my two "angels"....

We test drove the Mazda5 this evening. This was high on the list because of the lease offer of $199/mo. and it seats 6. But there are no government crash test ratings and the thing is tiny. Everything is extremely cramped and my 6' 5" husband looked very uncomfortable in the driver seat. Since he does all of our driving on long trips, I just can't do that to him.

The next option would be something like a Honda Accord, but then we aren't really saving any money, which was the point of selling the van.

My husband does fit very well in German cars. Americans are tiny -- because their population has been diluted by the Irish. We are now looking at *very* used BMWs. We've found a couple for about 5K and that will make everything worth it. If we can walk away with a 5K car that will last us for 3 years we will be ahead of the game. Plus, my hubby fits very well in a BMW. I think he decided to be so tall so that he could only drive luxury cars:)
The funny thing is that he drives a scooter to work every day. It is so funny (and cute) to see a 6' 5", 240 pound guy on a tiny scooter. I am blessed that he isn't vain.

Bye, bye minivan

We are no longer the owners of a minivan and I've not shed a single tear. We purchased our van about 2.5 years ago and I have to admit that it is freakin awesome with young kids. It can be a spaceship while you are in the garage doing laundry, the back seat makes a great changing table, you can easily climb around to buckle everyone and even bring many cousins on trips to the park.

Yes, it looks stupid and very uncool, but the convenience makes up for all that. I'm 33 and a mom, I lost "cool" about 5 years ago.

We sold the van to a very nice family today and the reason I've shed a tear is because we are going to pay off some major debt. We have way too many bills and we need to pay them off. Right now we are without a car.
The initial plan was to remain without a car for a few months and, because of the area we live in, it is "almost" doable. We can walk to the market, mall, doctor, school and parks. But we can't walk to my mom's, my work mail center or my brother's house. Also, we started t-ball this spring, and we can't walk to the t-ball fields. Adding up the price of cabs (buses around here are a joke) put us off on the idea.

We were thinking of leasing a Mazda5 because it seats 6, but after a search on Craig's list, we found something that might be even better.... a 1987 Vanagon.

Dude, I remember going on many trips with my bff -- we went camping, on beach trips and berry picking in the Vanagon. It was awesome.
We've got a financial plan now, so in two years we should be able to purchase a new car. Can a Vanagon do us right for the next two years? If we go this way, it will put us ahead in our gameplan.
We're going to check out a couple of Vanagons this weekend, so we'll see....

Snow day

We hit the steeps of Frazier Park last Sunday. It was a perfect day for sledding and the kids had a blast. The last time we went was 2 years ago and Lucas was definitely ready to sled his butt off. He and Phil went down some pretty steep hills and Luc ended up with his face in the snow numerous times. But his favorite activity of the day was licking the snow. Every time we turned around the kid was on the ground eating nature's snow cone.
We made a tiny snowman -- we named him TrashEye McGillicutty because one of his eyes was a budwieser bottlecap we found on the ground.

The one downside to these daytrips is that, as far as gear goes, we are unprepared. We don't have snowboots, snow jackets or snow pants. Why would I shell out $500+ outfitting our family for a once a year trip? We don't have the cash, so we just bought a bottle of scotch guard and doused our jeans. Yes, folks, we were the family in jeans and sneakers at the snow. It wasn't a pretty sight, but the kids didn't give a crap. There were some other families around and they were all decked out in the latest snow fashions.
It reminded me of when I was a kid.... We never had money for snow clothes, so we did the old scotch guard and jean thing way back then. As a "tween" I always swore that I wouldn't be like that as a grownup. Well, look at me now:)

Bye, bye binky. Bye, bye sleep.

My daughter finally gave up her binky three days ago. She's been on the fence about the whole thing lately, but on Thursday night, we couldn't locate a "dummy tit" anywhere (the dog has been finding them lately). My husband, who has been trying to get our daughter to give the thing up for more than a year, said, "well, that's it, no binky tonight."
Of course, he got to put her to bed that first night -- she did fine. Friday was a very busy day and she only asked for it a couple of times, but by bedtime, she was jones'n for it. We had the cousins over for a sleepover and I thought that would distract her. I was wrong.
She finally fell asleep at about 9:30. At 1:30 a.m. she was in my bed. My husband retreated to the couch because he was pissed that I allowed her to sleep with me -- he thinks it will set a precedent or something. Our kids are fairly good sleepers now, but it has taken a lot of work and he is very leery of anything that might allow them to fall into bad habits.

So we're at 1:30 and my daughter is like a junkie looking for a fix. I really felt bad for her. I couldn't console her -- she was wringing her hands, jumping out of bed every 2 minutes looking for "something" and just overall nervous. Poor little thing. We got through the night, but my eyes needed an extra dose of visine.

Tonight was bad putting her down to sleep. She was already very tired from little sleep last night and she wouldn't lie down. I cuddled up with her in bed but she was moving all over the place. Finally, she asked me to put her stuffed pig in the freezer for the second time (long story) and I said no. She got pissed and so did I... I had had it with the constant whining all day... and I said, "why don't I just throw your piggy in the trash!" She looked at me and said, "Mommy, that's not nice. Piggy is a stuffed animal, not a toy. I'm going to throw you right in the trash." At that point I was ready for it.

She's sleeping now, and I feel bad for losing my temper.

On a good note, tee-ball practice went much better today. My brother, who is coaching his daughter's softball team, showed me a few pointers and we passed them on to our son. He seemed to pick them up. He stopped a few balls, threw overhand, and ran the bases in order:)

tee-ball and too much chocolate

Today was Valentine's Day and that means my kids were bombarded with candy of all sorts at school and from grandparents. Everywhere you turn in our house there is a little bag filled with treats. It's hard to keep track of all the stuff and that is why about 10 minutes before we left for my son's first tee ball practice I suddenly realized that my daughter had stuffed a bunch of chocolate in her mouth. Uh-oh, I thought, this is not good.
No time to worry, got to get to tee ball on time (I hate being tardy for anything).
We headed out the door and were back 3 minutes later because I had forgotten my son's glove.

How was tee ball practice? It was painful to watch. My son got out there and hadn't a clue what to do. We've tried to throw and catch balls in the past, but the kid isn't a natural. Every "tee" we've bought in the past has ended up becoming a sword or something of that nature and is broken in a matter of days.
He threw underhand, folks. He couldn't catch a ball and he tried to hit lefty even though he is right handed. He ran from first base to third and then when it was time for him to run home, he headed back towards first. It wouldn't have been so bad, but all the other kids looked like they had been playing for years. He is the youngest on the team (just turned 5) but I was embarrassed that I hadn't prepared him more. The great thing was that he didn't notice his lack of skills and he had great fun. We'll practice a lot more at home to hone his "skills".

After practice we decided to head to the sporting goods store to pick up a real bat for Luc and some of the stuff he'll need once games start. About 5 minutes after we got to the store my daughter didn't look too good. She suddenly said, "I'm not going to throw up Momma." That usually means she's about to blow chunks.
I signaled to my husband that we had to leave asap. I took my daughter to the car and waited for Phil to pay for our things. On the drive home my daughter didn't look good. I grabbed the bag that held the new equipment, dumped everything out and held the bag up to her face.
It wasn't a pretty end to her Valentine's Day. But maybe she'll learn her lesson for next year:)
She recovered after an episode of Scooby Doo and was ready to join us all for dinner. She even had the nerve to ask for a treat after dinner -- I refused and she didn't protest, so maybe she did learn something.

First Barbie Bites the Dust

So my daughter received her first Barbie Doll for her birthday the other day. I remember really, really wanting a Barbie car when I was a little kid -- well, my 3 year old daughter received a Barbie and a sporty purple convertible from Aunt Cindy.

I'm afraid that Barbie won't be driving the car all that much. She was the victim of a freak chewing accident. I got home from dropping the kids at school and I had (still have) a ton of work to do. I grabbed a greenie bone for my dog -- you know, so she'll have nice breath -- and then turned my attention to my billing software. I heard Ruby chewing on her bone. About 5 minutes later a I turned to give her a pat and saw a bunch of tan plastic all over the floor. Barbie's leg was in Ruby's mouth and both of her arms were already gone.
I think 3 is too young for a Barbie anyway.

Christmas and Birthdays are over and the dog is house-trained (sort of)

Quite a bit of time has passed since my last post. I've been super busy and just didn't feel like writing anything down at the end of the day.
Since I last posted, we gained a four-legged friend, my son turned 5, we celebrated Christmas and my daughter's 3rd birthday.
My daughter will officially be 3 tomorrow.

Let's start with the first thing... our four-legged friend, Ruby. Ruby is named after the character from Ruby and Max -- but she is not as much of a biotch. My brothers approve of the name because it happens to be their favorite programming language. I'll just let them believe that she is named after that:) The first week we had Ruby the Rocket, she was a dream dog. We rescued her, so we have no idea what type of dog she is or how old she is. They estimate she is between 8 months and 2 years old. She has some terrier in her. When it started raining around here, she started peeing in the house. I had just finished with potty-training my daughter about 3 months previous, so I was a bit dismayed to have to be scrubbing carpets and washing bedding all day long. I think we have things fixed up again and she only pees inside if my husband gets her too excited and then picks her up -- must have some cocker spaniel in there somewhere.

A few weeks after we got Ruby, my son turned 5 . We had a really fun party for him, but I won't bore you with those details. I just want to say that 5 is a truly magical age. And I don't mean that in any sarcastic way. It seems like the day my son turned 5, he turned into a completely different boy. Gone is the difficult son who fought with his sister at every turn. Gone is the boy who cried everytime he scraped his knee or got water in his eyes. He gets his own snacks, he buckles sis into her booster seat, he even helps me wash the windows. I loved him before and thought he was awesome, but now my mind is blown almost every day by how mature and caring he is becoming. Don't get me wrong, folks, he is still a boy. He still runs around like a monkey and if we are in a store, he can't keep his hands off anything, but he is becoming such a unique person and I love that. 5 is the best... so far.

Three year old girls, on the other hand, I can do without. Starting about a month ago, my daughter started in with the terrible twos (and she'll be three tomorrow). She is not someone you want to be around. I have to hang out with her because I'm her mom, but stay away if you aren't related. Everything is so dramatic and if you tell her no or correct her about something... even in the most loving way... the waterworks turn on. She's sharp as a tack, but a little juvenile:)

We celebrated her birthday today at Chuck E. Cheese. It was a co-birthday with her cousin who will be turning 4 shortly. She also has a cousin who turns 3 on Monday and one who turns 6 on Tuesday. It's a busy month for my family. I highly recommend the co-birthday thing from an economic standpoint:) We don't have to do the party thing again and the parents of the kids make out because we split the bill.

We survived the holidays, with a very full house. I am a freak when it comes to stuff being everywhere, but I didn't go too crazy while we had 8 people sleeping in our little house for 3 nights. I did find myself pulling out the vacuum at inappropriate moments, but that's as far as I went. I didn't go around lifting people's glasses and sliding coasters underneath.

I hope you all had a happy December and a wonderful New Year. I feel optimistic that this is going to be a great year.

Reading is fun!

My little boy is a reader:) I never thought I would get so excited by the sentence, "Mat sat on Mac."
We bought Lucas some Bob Books a couple of months ago and at first he wasn't too interested. He's known his letters for a few years now, and has known their sounds for quite some time, too, but he didn't want to sit down and actually put letter sounds together.
About a month ago, I gave him a choice of activities for an afternoon and he chose reading the Bob Books. The first few days were a real struggle -- his first instinct was to go for the long sound of vowels but these books start with most vowels using their short sound.
But now we've moved onto our second set of books and he is reading in the hallway to himself, sounding out words, while I brush Amanda's teeth.
I admit that I'm one of those annoying parents who cheers when my kid goes down the slide, or starts swinging on the swing by himself, so of course, everytime he reads a string of new words, I give him a high five.
He brought his books to school for show and tell and both of his teachers came up to me at the end of the day to remark on how well he is reading and asked how often we practice. I beamed with pride and it almost canceled out the previous talk I had with his teachers about my boy's rambunctious behavior in the classroom.

I don't think I started reading until I was probably 6 years old. Luc is almost 5, so he's got me beat already.

License Plate Cover Seen Today

My other toy
has tits


I guess he must have paid a lot for them if he feels the need to tell the world.

Mellow Thanksgiving and Ghostriding Causes Me to Break My Butt

The members of the Crouse Haus headed down to O.C. to visit the Grandparents Crouse for a little Thanksgiving goodness. The highlight of the trip, for me, was making it down there in under an hour and fifteen minutes on Wednesday night. We have never made it down there that quickly before. It was amazing... the kids barely had time to get started complaining when we pulled up in the driveway. This is just the third time in my life that I've been away from my siblings and parents on Thanksgiving and it was very mellow. I come from a family of 7 kids, so when you add spouses and kids, the place gets wild. This year there were just six of us and it was nice. There was room for everyone at one table and there weren't a zillion different dishes that I felt obligated to try.
We hit South Coast Plaza the day after Thanksgiving just to watch the shoppers. Holy crap, I cannot believe how many people were there. It was like a movie, with people bumping into one another, strollers loaded with so much crap that the babies were being dragged along by their parents. We left just spending $2 to ride the carousel and a bit on lunch. Nice. I've done most of my shopping online and just have a few odds and ends to pick up. The hardest part for me is wrapping, because I am a shitty wrapper.

Thank God I have a laptop, because I'm typing this while lying down. I think I broke my tailbone today. My husband says it's just bruised a bit, but shit, it hurts. My kids love it when my husband straps them into the double stroller and ghostrides them. He stands in our culdesac and gives them a trememdous push and they ride all the way to the top of our driveway, where I am waiting to give them a shove back down to my husband. They freak out it is so much fun. Hubby ate a little too much spinach for lunch and he gave them too big of a push this afternoon. They came zooming at me -- only a few inches behind me was the garage door -- and I couldn't fully stop the thing. I don't know exactly what happened, except I went flying in the air and landed square on my ass. It hurt like a bitch! That's 115 pounds (well, probably 118 after the Thanksgiving feast) coming down on my little tailbone. Over the course of the afternoon, the pain has increased. I just pray I won't be sitting on a donut this week at work.

nanowrimo a little behind...

I got a late start with nanowrimo.org because I didn't find out about the thing until we were well into November. What a great idea, and just what I need to put a fire under my ass.
I'm only up to about 3,800 words so I doubt I'll "win" this year, but hey, it's good practice. My husband has taken the kids out this afternoon so I can get a bit more words down, and I needed to take a break -- take a break by writing more.

This afternoon my husband asked when I was going to finish my book and bring in a million bucks. I replied that I needed to be rich so that I could devote all time to writing instead of pushing papers at work and scrubbing toilets on the side. He said that once I made my million I could "write for a living." But there's the catch 22, right. I need money in order to keep the dream alive. I find that at the end of the day -- after putting in time with work, caring for the kiddos and keeping the house from falling part -- my brain is in a fog. The past few months have been dry. I am all too happy to pick up a book and stick my nose in it for 2 hours in the evening rather than spending that type pounding on the keyboard.

So, here I am with another hour or two of writing time -- minus the 15 it took me to get dinner in the oven -- and I'm taking a quick break to write some nonsense here. It may be silly, but it does help clear my head. Writing down the day to day junk here gets it out of my head and leaves room for better things.

Bee Movie gets an A and where are my kids?

I took the kids + cousin Ben to see Bee Movie today. I was a little worried because it was PG and I thought it might not hold their interest, but at less than 90 minutes running time, I decided to give it a go. The kids loved it and so did I. A few folks didn't make it through the movie, but my charges sat almost quietly through the entire thing. They did eat their weight in junior mints and I had to take out a small home equity loan to pay for the movie and snacks, but it was worth it.
Now they are all happily building a fort in the living room and I have a few minutes to waste.

Speaking of the good behavior at the movies, what the hell has happened to my kids lately? A few weeks ago I was ready to tear my hair out. They were constantly fighting and never listening to a word I was saying. The past two weeks have been, well, strange. I am getting compliments on how well-behaved my kids are and now I wonder what the hell I was doing wrong for so long.

I have been plenty stressed out the past 6 months or so.... mostly about money and jobs, both mine and my husband's. Those situations haven't gotten better. Husband seems to keep getting bad news and taking out business loans, while medicare hasn't reimbursed his business since April! 80% of his patients are medicare, so that basically means no money for the business. Apparently a lot of PTs and doctors are having trouble with medicare, so we're not alone, but shit, we're talking the death of a business. Anyway, my anxiety level was at an all time high and trying to meditate or exercise my anxiety away wasn't working. After yelling at my kids for something trivial because I was stressed out, I decided to ask my doctor for a little help. 13 days into taking medication for my anxiety and I feel like a new person.

I didn't realize how much my anxiety could have been affecting my kids until I noticed how their behavior started to improve as I started to feel better. They weren't little out of control monsters, their mother was.

Invasion

The invasion has begun and I'm on a mission of destruction. The other day some ants invaded the master bathroom. I got rid of them and hoped that would be that. The next morning as Lucas was using the kids' bathroom he yelled that he was surrounded by ants... they hadn't gone, just moved. Ants in my house are one of my worst nightmares. The kids don't bring food into their rooms and I try to keep things pretty clean by dusting and vacuuming regularly -- apparently, the ants don't care. They want in.

I called my Orkin guy because we have a service every two months around the outside of the house to keep ants and spiders at a minimum. The guy came out this morning and took care of the problem in the bathroom. About an hour ago I went to put the kids down for a nap. I decided to lie down with them for a bit because I was damn tired. A few minutes into naptime, I heard son saying, "I see ants!" I looked up and sure enough, there were hundreds of critters trailing all along the baseboards. I quickly shooed the kids into my room and I tried to get a handle on the situation.
Of course, since this is the kids' room, I don't want to fill it with Raid. I filled a bottle up with vinegar and sprayed all over. They were under the mattresses, along the wall, climbing on the bookcase... everywhere. Help!
After soaking them with vinegar, I sprinkled all around with baking soda. I'm not sure what else to do that is natural. I will wait for everything to dry and then vacuum and dump the vacuum bag. If they keep coming back I'm going to abandon the house and move in with my mom:) The thought of an ant climbing on my precious child while he is sleeping is more than I can bear.

Anyone get rid of ants indoors without using chemicals? I don't mind spraying that stuff outside, but inside... I'm a little leery.

It's all relative and Halloween movie suggestions

I stopped by the local CVS store today to pick up new toothbrushes for the kids -- we had an ant invasion in the kid's bathroom (I swear it is clean) and I found a few of the critters on the toothbrushes. Yuck! Anyway, we had to stop by the Halloween section to try on scary masks. Amanda was scared of all of them until Lucas picked up a hockey mask, and said, "Look, Amanda, this one isn't scary at all." "You're right, Lucas," she said, as she picked up her own hockey mask to try on and my two little Jasons walked up and down the aisle wondering why people were running for their lives. My kids haven't seen Friday the Thirteenth, so the hockey mask thing isn't a bit scary. I really found that amusing. Guess I need to get out more.

Every Halloween, I rent the movie Halloween and carve my pumpkin. Since the kids came along, we carve the pumpkin first and I save the scary movie for when they are tucked in bed. Then hubby and I bake our pumpkin seeds and watch the show. I know, it is a cheesy horror flick from the '70's but for some reason, that movie always leaves me anxious for the next few nights. I'll turn out the lights and that music starts playing in my head. I usually have about 3 or 4 nights of not sleeping well.
Anyway, I think I'm going to make a change this year and skip watching Halloween, even though I love it. I need my sleep these days, so a nice, old-timey thriller will do.
If anyone reads this and has any suggestions, let me know.
I'm thinking along the lines of "Sorry Wrong Number" or "Dial M for Murder".

First day of school

My daughter had her first day of school today:)
She barely had time to say goodbye to me as I dropped her off -- so much for first day jitters.
She's been going to the school for a year and half now with me to drop off my son, so she is familiar with all the teachers and many of the kids. She is a favorite of the other two Amanda's who already attend -- that makes three Amandas in a very small preschool.
After the drop-off, which I expected to take a while, but actually only took a few minutes, I headed home to dig into work. Man, did I get some work done today. It's amazing how much I can accomplish in 4 hours when I am not constantly interrupted to have a tea party or dress up like Batman. I was really lucky to have more than 2.5 years with daughter right by my side, but I was more than ready to have her start her education:)
I think we'll all be a little better off with the kids in school a few hours a week and my boss will be happy that our customers are getting some attention.

Tonight my daughter called grandma (my mom-in-law) to tell her about the first day. MIL said that I must have been staring at the walls wondering what to do with myself while the kids were away. I had to walk in the other room and count to ten... come on, woman, I have a JOB outside of laundry and cooking and I barely had time to finish up before I gobbled down a Lean Cuisine (at my desk) and ran out the door to pick the kids up in time. I know she meant well, but damn, it really made me feel like she doesn't know beans about me.

Confusion... is it really mine? Decisions....

After re-reading my last post, it seems that I am the one who is confused, not my kids.
They are asking totally logical questions but they just aren't the ones I was expecting yet. We're all ready for "why is the sky blue?" and all that, but haven't given much thought to questions about different types of people or families that are out there.
I did tell my son that, yes, some boys do marry other boys, but that most people happen to marry someone of the opposite sex. Is that all I need to say at this point? Do I need to add more, like it's OK to marry someone of the same sex but I'm hoping we don't have to cross that bridge? Doesn't that make it sound like I don't approve? I want to teach the kids to be accepting of all good humans out there and to care for other people no matter the color of their skin, the language they speak or if they choose a mate who has the same body parts as themselves. All of those things are easy for me to talk to them about at this point in time, but I'm wondering how I'm going to handle things when they demand more of an explanation.

The Crouse Haus is under a tremendous amount of stress lately. My job, which I've had for more than 12 years, is on shaky ground and I don't know if it will be there in a few months. My husband's clinic is having issues right now and we aren't bringing in the same income we were when we purchased this house with a huge mortgage. We've been in the red for about 9 months now and the savings have vanished. My husband seems to be totally out to lunch concerning these issues and being that I am the one who handles all the finances, I feel that I am shouldering all the stress right now. I've tried to approach the subject of possibly selling our house and his response was to bring in an extra $50/mo by renting out the side of our house to someone for RV or boat storage.
Of course, for my husband, moving "down" would be a totally shot at his ego. Here he is, working 50 hours a week at his own clinic and he can't even afford a decent house for his family. I don't look at it like that, but he does.
Our options are to try to cut costs at home -- cancel cable, never turn on lights, eat spaghetti every night, shop at used clothing stores, cut our own hair and cancel Christmas and vacations for the next 3 years.
Option 2 would be to sell our home and find a nice townhouse or possibly rent a place for a year or two.
Anyone out there rent with kids? I'm wondering if the kids will suffer by not living in a "neighborhood". Will other kids want to come over to play? We've owned a house since before we had the kids and I grew up living in a regular single family dwelling.

One thing is for sure, something's got to give. For my own mental health and the mental health of my kids, I'm hoping husband will go for option 2.